Thankful

Every day I am so SO happy to spend my days with my children. Every day has difficult moments in which I have to remind myself why I am doing what I am doing and why it is valuable. Every day I look at my children and feel so in love with them. Every day I feel sad when I realize how much time has passed since each one first entered our lives. Fours years, two years, and ten months is not long for someone who has adult children, but to me it is significant. Truly, where does the time go? I wake up with a mixture of happiness and sadness. Happy for a new day to spend living out my current passion, but sad that another day has come and gone. I worry that my time with my children will end quicker than I am expecting. I fear it, but I'm glad the thought is always present in my mind. I think living without an awareness of your own mortality is worse. But I've come to realize the only way to overpower that fear is to live more fully. My children are heathy and thriving and growing each day and that is awesome. Every day I want to cherish my time, my life, and all the goodness I have to be thankful for. I have much to be thankful for.

LOVE. {especially to the one behind the camera}

10 things today

These are 10 things I know today.

1 When you discuss and follow the moon phases on a daily basis full moon time becomes VERY exciting. The moon is amazing and beautiful.

2 Children learn constantly. You could "teach" them nothing and they would learn, it's innate.

3 My days are busy and exhausting, but they fly by. The days are long short and the years are short. Remember this always. Like how is he this big and adorable?

4  You can have fun with play dough at any age.

5 Contrary to my previous feelings, the beach is a good time.

6 My dad loves to fish and has passed that joy to my children. 

7 You gotta do what ya gotta do. Like nurse your baby in the middle of Kroger while your other children take pictures of you and chew on bags of frozen vegetables. 

8 Cooking with helpers is more stress AND more fun.

9 Summer 2013 has been the summer of rain. It has literally rained almost every day. I love rain so I cannot complain.

10 Whole foods is a great addition to the city of Savannah.

My Grandpa Griswold

Two weeks ago, on St. Patrick's Day, my Grandpa Griswold passed away in his home of 60 years surrounded by many of his children.  It's fitting that he passed away on St. Patrick's Day because he was the biggest Notre Dame fan I know. He loved those Fighting Irish!  I have so many fond memories of my Grandpa and will miss him very much in the years to come. Hornell, the town in upstate New York where he and both of my parents grew up, will not be the same without him because he did so much in his lifetime and touched so many people.  You can read about his life in his very long obituary found here.  I knew my Grandpa as a jokester first and foremost, but also as a person who told the best stories and gave lots of advice about life. I loved sitting and talking with him and listening to his memories from his childhood, of my Grandma, and of my mom and her siblings when they were growing up.

Summer 2010 Cambria and I went to visit Grandpa with my mom. 

Summer 2011 our family drove up to New York for a week long visit with my Grandpa.
47 Bennett Street is a special place. 

It would've been too much stress and money to drive or fly our whole family, so Avett and I flew up by ourselves last weekend to be there for the funeral.  The trip was easy and for the most part stress-free.  Despite the circumstances, it was wonderful seeing so many of my extended family members I don't get to see often. My mom comes from a family of 13 children and my dad 10, so I have lots and lots of aunts, uncles and cousins. 

Avett was an amazing travel companion on our journey there and back. I don't recall him crying at all either time! We flew out of Savannah, had a layover in LaGuardia where we met up with my sister Amber, and then flew into Rochester. In Rochester we met up with Ashley, Casey and Raya and stayed in a hotel for the night before driving to Hornell Sunday morning. 

Waiting for Aunt Amber in LaGuardia. 

Waiting to takeoff to Rochester. 

I was excited to have Amber on the flight with us! 

Avett Patrick <3

Got to spend some quality Raya time on the drive to Hornell.  It was nice having smiling faces like hers around. 

Our stay in Hornell was busy with viewings, family time and my Grandpa's funeral. It was an exhausting and sad few days, but it was also a very peaceful visit for me. It was nice being able to focus solely on Avett and to slow our pace a little bit.

Mommy and Avett.

Can't give him enough kisses. 

My mom snuck a picture of us before we woke up on Monday morning. 

On Monday we had my Grandpa's funeral and then went to the cemetery where all of my grandparents and great-grandparents are buried. It is such a beautiful cemetery, especially when there is snow on the ground. Afterwards my mom and all of her siblings took a picture in my Grandpa's backyard.  In the background you can see the 13 trees my grandparents planted years ago in the back of the yard, one for each of their children.

My mother with her eleven {living} siblings.  They are in birth order from right to left. 

Avett with Aunt Amber. 

With my Aunt Margaret. 

With my cousin Jennifer, her son Caden, Ashley, and Raya. 

All of the Griswold children having a family meeting. 

On Tuesday morning my Aunt Bobbie drove us to the airport and within a few hours we were home.  We were all so happy to see each other again! 

On our last flight home. 

All my babies together again. 

I am happy I was able to make the trip to New York to celebrate my Grandpa's life and to say my last goodbye. I will make sure my children know about him and what he meant to me. Death is sad, but it is also the thing that all of us have in common, so for me it's a reminder to live life in the best way possible now because tomorrow is never promised. My Grandpa lived a full life and left such a beautiful legacy! 

My life now

We're just over two months into having three kids and if I could sum up the transition from two to three in one word it would be hard.  Completely manageable and very enjoyable, but also hard. 

Having a baby for the first time is a shock. You go from sleeping when you want, eating when you want, and generally only thinking about the well-being of yourself, to having to care for another tiny person 24/7.  Not to mention this huge life change {usually} begins exactly after the exhausting and painful work of labor and birth. It's a huge shock. When I had Cambria I felt like my life went from 0 to 100 in a matter of hours and it really hasn't slowed down since.

When Ezra was born everything was easier. I knew what labor felt like, I had experience breastfeeding,  I wasn't in school or working, and I already knew how to care for a newborn.  I was already used to the constant demands of a baby/toddler.  It was difficult at times learning to balance them both when I was by myself, but generally, it was a smooth transition. 

Transitioning to three has been much more confusing and difficult. Kyle and I are now outnumbered. And when I am by myself with them I am completely and totally outnumbered.  I have a child with or on me at all times.  Avett sleeps next to me in bed at night and I get out of bed in the morning when either Cambria or Ezra wakes.  Avett is a HUGE fan of being worn so he's in the Ergo or Moby pretty much whenever he's not nursing. That means I have NO time to focus on myself or much of anything else. I love my children more than anything, but there have been moments over the past two months when I just want my space.  I'm beginning to realize how important it is to take time for myself.  Since having Avett, my mind has been so fuzzy and I've had difficulty focusing and staying present, but I find that when I do take some time for myself {running, blogging, showering, reading}, those things improve. I had the idea to initiate a "quiet time" for Cambria for 30-45 minutes everyday and it's been a great change for us both.

Our families have been a huge help these last few months. My mom, Kyle's mom and my sister Casey have all been amazing. They've babysat Cambria and Ezra for us while we run errands, run races, or just enjoy a meal by ourselves...and Avett of course.  Casey is GREAT with Cambria and Ezra. I joke that they like her better than they do me. :) Having three children so young and so close would be much harder without help from our family.

Being home with my children is the only thing I would want to be doing with my life right now. I don't have to remind myself often that they will only be young once and this precious time in their lives will pass so quickly, because that's already happening with Cambria.  But over the past two months, I've had many moments where I've almost resented Kyle for being able to wake up on his own, shower, and leave the house to associate with other adults and focus on something other than our kids. But then I snap back to reality and realize that I truly love and enjoy my daily life. I love cooking for my family, I love doing art projects with my kids, I love teaching them things,  I love the pace of our days, and I love devoting my self to them everyday. When I have moments of despair, I try and remember these things.

I want to organize our house and clean more often, I want to read more, I want to blog more,  I want to make more time for myself, I need to maintain my relationships with friends I really care about, I need to figure out how I am going to "homeschool" Cambria for Pre-K, I need to focus on my real life more instead of the online world, I need to focus on my relationship with Kyle more, etc. etc. etc. So many things I want to do and so little time to do them all.

I am trying to simplify our house and our life. I am trying to stay focused and present.  Life is happening and my children are growing before my eyes and I don't want to miss it.

Around our house

Since Avett was born, we've all been spending a lot more time at home. But especially the kids and me. We'll go a few days without actually driving anywhere in the car.   I am having a hard time keeping up with all the demands of taking care of three children + all the housework that needs to get done on a daily basis. And leaving the house with three is a bit more complicated than with only two.  So really it's just more convenient and comfortable for all of us to stay home more often than not. Here are a few of the things we do to occupy our time.

Make pizzas in our dinosaur diaper. 

Play outside and even swim if it's warm enough. 

Snap a picture of a brother and a kiss. 

Spend lots and lots of time in this room. 

The craft room/learning room/art room.

But here I was snuggling my Avett. 

Make rainbow vegetable trays. 

Admire new Avett. 

Play in the rice sensory bin.

Grow way too fast. 

Make Valentine ladybugs. 

Play with Case. 

Drink hot chocolate out of tea cups. 

Do "yoga" and "gymnastics" outside. 

 Search the fridge for something good. 

Find lemons to make for lemonade.

 Work as a team to squeeze them.

Enjoy the hard work. 

Look cute and stylish after a bath. 

Make play dough.

Then play with it. 

Give in to mommy's kiss request. 

Look adorable during a nap. 

Share many, many meals together. 

Cuddle with Avett some more. 

Help Daddy make pancakes on Saturday morning. 

Help bathe little brother. 

And sometimes we sit in front of the t.v. eating Chobani yogurt with chia seeds because, why not? :)